It's A Wonderful Life In Hinata
by memesis
Summary: "It's A Wonderful Life" for the Love Hina cast


"It's A Wonderful Life In Hinata"  
Bill Garrett   
A Love Hina side-story/fanfic (gaiden, if you insist)  
  
  
  
  
  
---  
  
Keitaro slumped down in defeat and let his head fall with a dull thud onto  
the surface of his chest of drawers. A slip of paper fell from his hand and  
landed on the floor, face up: "Urashima Keitaro, entrance evaluation  
test. Score: E".  
  
There was a brief knock before the door slid open and Shinobu peeked in.  
"Urashima-sempai, your tea is ready.. Are you okay?"  
  
Keitaro's form, slumped over the chest of drawers, managed just enough energy  
to wave a dismissive hand in Shinobu's direction. "Please.. set it on the  
counter, I'll come out for it later."  
  
Shinobu's eyes clouded slightly. "Did.. Did your test results... ah, the tea  
is getting cold! I'm sorry! I'll have it warmed up for you in the kitchen!"  
She drew the door hastily shut and footsteps could be heard running through  
the hall outside.  
  
A few minutes later his door was opened without prelude by Motoko, and  
Keitaro felt the chill of cold steel against his neck. "I discovered  
Shinobu crying in the kitchen," Motoko quietly explained. "When I asked  
what ailed her, she said `Keitaro...' and went back to crying. If you  
have hurt her or taken advantage of her.. I'll carve you up." The blade  
was withdrawn and the door closed as Motoko stalked out.  
  
Keitaro roused himself from the dresser and glanced around the room.  
The envelope with rent, the all-important envelope, was still missing.  
He'd searched everywhere he could think of. Even Kitsune denied  
involvement, and for once he believed her.  
  
Things couldn't sink any lower.  
  
---  
  
Keitaro stared across the mist-shrouded expanse that stretched away from  
the bridge on either side. It was on this very bridge that he'd watched  
his promised girl leave him forever; it was here that he'd first met Shinobu  
without realizing it; it was here that he'd waved goodbye to Naru when she'd  
gone to college. Right now Naru's promise to wait for him seemed meaningless  
and empty. She hadn't visited or even called.  
  
His life was in a shambles. He was disgraced in front of the entire household  
for losing the precious rent money. His aunt must believe him to be a  
worthless slacker, and he couldn't bear to think what Grandma Hina must think  
of him. And Naru... Keitaro was almost glad she hadn't come to visit, for  
fear of having to face her.  
  
The mist swirled ominously around the bridge. Keitaro's resolve grew.  
"I'll do it," he murmured to himself. "I've got to have some courage, in  
the end. It'll be over soon..."  
  
There was a sudden splash. Keitaro was shocked out of his depression by  
the sound. It was followed very closely by the sound of a young girl's scream.  
  
"Hey.." he called uncertainly. "Somebody down there?"  
  
"I'm drowning, you fool!" the girl's voice yelled back angrily.  
  
Keitaro blinked for a second, then vaulted the edge of the bridge and plummeted  
into the water. The courage which had driven his urge for suicide earlier  
sustained him as he fished about frantically, trying to determine where the  
girl had fallen in.  
  
At long last Keitaro emerged onto the bank, a strange girl clinging to his  
back. In the moonlight Keitaro could see her cute face, rich black hair,  
and strange facial marks. The hammer strapped to her back was an oddity,  
as were her clothes, but Keitaro cared for none of that at present - she was  
someone who needed his help.  
  
"Come on, you're probably soaking and freezing.. let's get you out of those,"  
Keitaro offered. The girl just looked at him strangely. Keitaro glanced back  
and realized that his hands had slipped from supporting her legs to grasping  
her backside. The girl closed her eyes and got a very serious expression on  
her face.  
  
"Set me down."  
  
Keitaro did so. The girl drew the hammer from her back.  
  
"...PERVERT!"  
  
---  
  
When Keitaro awoke, he was laying on a bench near the bridge. His clothes  
were dry and he didn't feel cold anymore. Nearby the girl was polishing  
her hammer. Her hair, now that it was dry, had a shine even in the moonlight.  
Her face was one of the prettiest he remembered seeing. But even beyond that,  
there was something..special about her, something he couldn't place.  
  
"How did I end up here?" he asked in confusion.  
  
"I dragged you up here. Now, I don't have any more time for stupid  
questions. I've heard all of them already so I'll just answer them now.  
What's my name? Ummm, you can call me Clarice. Why am I here? To save  
your life. Why did I jump in the water to save your life? Well it stopped  
YOU from jumping in, didn't it. And I'm a goddess, so don't give me any  
trouble. No, I don't have any wings or anything like that." The  
girl - Clarice - got a pleased expression on her face and begin to smooth  
out folds in her dress. Keitaro stammered.  
  
"Come on, did I get them all?" the girl demanded. Keitaro nodded mutely.  
  
"All right then. So...um, if you don't mind my asking, why were you going  
to jump anyway?" she asked.  
  
Keitaro shrugged. "... Too many reasons to go into."  
  
"What, the money business, and that girl, Narusegawa?"  
  
Keitaro gawked. "How did you know about that!?"  
  
"I just told you, I'm a goddess, remember? It's my business to know. And to  
help. I grant wishes, you know."  
  
Keitaro frowned. "Yeah? I wish I'd never been born."  
  
Clarice glanced over, then up into the night sky. "You know, that's not a bad  
idea. Thanks!"  
  
---  
  
The night air was cool. The moon's soft glow began to fade as a cloud cover  
rolled in over the city. Keitaro glumly watched the lights of Hinata Inn  
fade off in the distance.  
  
"Ok," Clarice announced, jumping to a standing position and pointing up at  
the sky. "The Lord has decreed that for as long as you wish it, you've never  
been born."  
  
Keitaro rolled his eyes. Jumping off the bridge must have done something to  
her, he decided. "Anyway," he offered, "if you don't have somewhere to stay  
tonight, I'm the residence manager at the Hinata Inn up on the hill.. you're  
welcome to sleep--"  
  
He was cut off by the girl's laughter. "Hinata? You aren't the residence  
manager there. Come on, I'll show you!" She began striding up the road with  
Keitaro in confused pursuit.  
  
When they arrived in front of the building, Keitaro gasped in shock. Coming  
up the steps, he'd interpreted the darkness as lights-out, but the sight  
confronting him was something completely unbelievable.  
  
The Inn, formerly a well-maintained residence, was a disreputable shamble of  
sagging boards, half-missing walls and partially dismantled structure. The  
sign at the front was missing, replaced with a crude announcement: "Closed  
by order of the City Council for demolition."  
  
Keitaro fell to his knees, clutching his head in panic. "Wha.. What's going  
on here?! I was just gone for a few hours!"  
  
Clarice gave the ruin a once-over and glanced down at Keitaro. "You sure  
you run this place? Looks pretty smashed up," she remarked coolly.  
  
"But it wasn't like this just a little bit ago!" he angrily returned. "I..  
I...they couldn't have ..they must have foreclosed almost immediately! That  
means the girls have been evicted! I've got to find them and apologize.  
Maybe they're staying with Mutsumi.. that's got to be it!" He jumped up and  
dashed down the hill, bound for where he knew Mutsumi's apartment would be.  
  
---  
  
When the door was finally opened in response to his insistent knocking,  
Keitaro breathlessly let out, "Mutsumi, it's about the Inn, the've already  
started to knock-GACK!" He was cut off when he saw who'd answered the door -  
an older man, dressed in nothing but boxers, and very hairy.  
  
"I.. I'm sorry, but is Miss Otohime Mutsumi in, sir?" Keitaro managed.  
  
The man grunted. "Otohime Mutsumi? Don't know anyone named that. Did your  
little princess move away without telling you or something, young man? If  
she were my daughter, I'd forbid her to date anyone who rudely pounded  
on the door in the middle of the night."  
  
Keitaro backed away, repeatedly bowing. "I'm terribly sorry, honored sir,  
it will not happen again! Forgive my intrusion!" He bowed all the way down  
the steps until he was out of sight, and heard the door click closed above.  
  
Clarice was waiting for him at the bottom of the stairs. "Wasn't your friend  
in, Keitaro?" she asked slyly.  
  
He turned, his face caught in a mask of fright. "She-she-she's not there,  
it was some old man.. where could they all be?!"  
  
Quietly, Clarice said, "Keitaro?"  
  
"What is it, Clarice?"  
  
"You got your wish, Keitaro. You've never been born. Mutsumi doesn't live  
here because she never met you and Naru. She's back in Okinawa, without  
the ambition to get into Tokyo University herself."  
  
Keitaro swept his hand as though trying to knock the statement away from  
him. "That's impossible! She's got to be here..somewhere.."  
  
Clarice shook her head and glanced up at the sky for a moment as though  
in thought. "Come on," she snapped, "we need to get moving. This is  
a dangerous neighborhood."  
  
---  
  
Keitaro's burning need for answers had cooled in the night air, and he was  
eventually forced to find warmth and a place to sit down. Clarice joined him  
in a small all-night cafe' that Keitaro didn't remember seeing on his trips  
through the town before.  
  
Sipping his tea, Keitaro sat lost in thought. Clarice sat beside him,  
looking at him with concern on her face.  
  
"No.. I won't believe it," he muttered to himself.  
  
"You've got to believe it," she insisted. "The people you knew simply aren't  
here because you were never there to act as residence manager. The Inn  
was forced to close."  
  
"But.. Grandma Hina.."  
  
Clarice was very quiet. "Your grandmother died several years ago. It was  
having a grandson to look after and visit with that would have kept her  
going..but without that..." her voice trailed off. "Your aunt Haruka kept  
it open as long as possible, but in the end, it was too much for her to  
keep track of. She retired.."  
  
Keitaro was about to respond when a raucious interruption cut through his  
train of thought. Instantly he recognized the voice: none other than  
Kitsune. But she sounded drunker than her usual limit permitted.  
  
"I SAID, GET ANOTHER ROUND OVER HERE! These boys and I have a lot.. to..  
celibate...no..celebrate, right boys?" The crowd of men around her cleared  
for a moment, and Keitaro was able to make out Kitsune's face. Her hair was  
in disarray and she was wearing more makeup than he remembered.  
  
"..Kitsune?"  
  
Kitsune's bleary eyes focused - or tried to focus - on Keitaro. "Hhey,  
cutie," she slurred. "Come on over and have a drink with Kitsune-chan.  
I don't remember your name but that ain't important!"  
  
Keitaro got up and approached the table in disbelief. "Kitsune.. what's  
happened to you? This isn't like you at all!"  
  
"Shure it is," she mumbled, then brightened. "Hey, let's go! I wanna get  
reacquainted!"  
  
Keitaro blinked. Kitsune stood unsteadily and almost fell into him. He could  
feel her body press up against him in a most suggestive manner, much moreso  
than the Kitsune he remembered would willingly do. "You ..recognize me,  
Konno?"  
  
She grinned drunkenly. "Nope, not at all. But you know my name, so I guess  
we musta..y'know, met before. So where we goin', stud? Your place?"  
  
Keitaro backed away slowly. "This isn't right.. this can't be you, Kitsune.  
I'm sorry!" He stumbled out of the cafe'. Clarice slipped past the drunken  
girl staggering her way back to the crowd and followed him out onto the  
darkened street.  
  
"How much more do you want to see, Keitaro?"  
  
Keitaro shook his head. "This can't be real.. this has got to be another  
one of my bad fantasy dreams or something.."  
  
"I'm afraid it's no dream," Clarice said gently.  
  
---  
  
Keitaro stumbled past the sign hanging on the door of the Maehara's old  
restaurant: "Out of Business." He let himself slide up against the wall  
and stop moving. His knees almost gave out, and Clarice rushed forward to  
catch his fall.  
  
"What.. what happened to Kitsune?"  
  
Clarice shrugged a little. "Without the Inn, without you and Naru as her  
`project', without Naru around as a friend, she fell into ..a slump." The  
girl shuddered a bit.  
  
"But she'd never become like that! She's too strong to let herself.."  
  
Clarice cut him off with a wave. "Is anyone really strong enough on their  
own? Don't we all need each other sometimes? She needed Naru, and Naru  
needed you."  
  
Keitaro sucked in a breath. "Naru - what happened to Naru?"  
  
Clarice pointed. "She's thataway. Well.. you might not like it."  
  
He glared at her. "What is it?!"  
  
"See for yourself," the girl shrugged.  
  
---  
The snow-covered steps of Tokyo University glimmered in the moonlight  
as Keitaro and Clarice approached. The dead calm might have seemed peaceful  
and ethereal once, but to Keitaro it was like a dreadful omen. Off to the  
left, three people were hovering around a beat-up van.  
  
Keitaro peered carefully into the distance. "That's Seta's van! And  
that's.... Naru!" He began sprinting and slipped after only five steps,  
crashing down in a heap. Clarice hunkered down beside him.  
  
"She's not who you remember," Clarice sighed. "She's as romantically  
inept as you are... she never got over her crush on Seta, but she can't  
get involved with him. She-- ok fine, go find out for yourself!" she yelled,  
as Keitaro regained his feet and once again dashed in the direction of  
the van.  
  
He stopped short of the three, still loading pottery into the back, and  
hunched over to catch his breath as each of the three turned to look  
him over.  
  
"N..Naru...segawa?"  
  
"Do I know you?" she mumbled. It was Naru, but with her hair tied off and  
her glasses on, in her usual school attire. None of her normal vibrant energy  
came through in her voice. It was as though she was sleeptalking.  
  
Keitaro blinked. "... Seta? Do you know me? Sara?"  
  
Sara shook her head and stuck out her tongue. "Don't think I'd want to!"  
  
Seta patted Sara gently on the shoulder and smiled, "Let's be polite! You  
apparently know me, young man, and this is my daughter Sara of course,  
and this is my teaching assistant, Naru." He indicated each in turn.  
"Did I forget to give you a homework assignment or something?"  
  
Keitaro shook his head violently, "N-no! Please, just tell me.. when did  
Narusegawa become your assistant?"  
  
Seta tapped one finger against his chin for a few moments, looking up at  
the sky. "Hmm, that would have been a year ago, maybe a year after she  
graduated.. I'm sorry she never tried to get into a university, but,"  
he laughed, "she's been so wonderfully helpful!" Naru hung her head a  
little to hide the sorrowful expression on her face, but said nothing.  
  
Keitaro grabbed hold of Naru's arms and shook her. "Naru! Don't you  
remember me? Please... hit me.. please, remember.." he cried. He could  
feel hot tears running out of his eyes, but seconds passed without anything  
happening. Naru only looked away and mumbled, "Please... let go of me."  
  
Keitaro's grasp faltered and he began slowly backing away. Then he ran,  
like a man possessed, into the night.  
  
---  
  
The snowy streets seemed endless, and the usual background of revelry and joy  
that pervaded the city sounded like a hollow mockery. Keitaro ran and ran,  
tears streaming down his face, shouting and sobbing. After uncounted time  
he was forced to stop and lean up against the wall of a building to regain  
his energy. After a few seconds of panting he began to realize that he wasn't  
the only one crying.  
  
Huddled against a wall of wooden barrels was a child-sized bundle of rags  
and cloth. Periodic sniffles and the occasional sneeze came from inside the  
mess. Keitaro roused himself enough to stumble over to the bundle and  
draw some of the folds away. When he saw what was underneath, he fell  
backwards into the snow.  
  
Kaolla Su sniffled again and looked out at him with hooded, red eyes.  
"D-d-d-d-do you have a-a-a-anything good to eat?" she whimpered.  
  
"Su-chan...? What.. what are you doing here?" Keitaro exclaimed, then came  
to his senses. "Come on, let's get you out of the cold."  
  
Through the streets he walked, carrying Su in his arms. She clung to him  
with a deathly cold grip and said little. At long last he came to a  
dingy-looking restaurant. The door swung open and Clarice was waiting  
inside, a look of compassion on her face. For the first time that evening,  
Keitaro managed a weak smile.  
  
---  
  
He set Su down in a booth and ordered several rounds of hot tea. Clarice  
sat opposite, fiddling with one of the decorations on her dress and not  
looking up or saying anything. She seemed troubled.  
  
At long last Keitaro mumbled, "What happened.. to Su?"  
  
Clarice sighed. "She came here... but without the Inn to stay at, she  
had to find other places to live. And none of them were as, uh, tolerant  
of her personality."  
  
"So she's been freezing in the streets?" Keitaro shouted, then lowered  
his voice. "I mean... didn't anyone else..?"  
  
Clarice shook her head. "Anyone else? Who? Nobody you know stayed there.  
It's a dangerous area to live in, with muggers and worse prowling the  
streets at night."  
  
The weight of everything settled down onto his shoulders, and Keitaro slumped  
into the booth beside the now-sleeping Su. "I.. how could all this have  
happened?" he demanded. "None of this makes sense."  
  
Clarice's voice was serious. "Because of you, your grandmother had  
decades of happiness ahead of her. She found the energy to turn her  
unprofitable hotel into a girls' dorm, where all these girls met.. because  
the dorm was there, Aoyama Motoko moved in, and stories of a kendo girl in  
the neighborhood kept this one of the safest places in Japan to live.  
Without a place to call home here, Shinobu was caught up in the divorce  
and had to leave her few friends behind. Because of you, Naru found  
someone she could.. well, you two could have worked it out, if you'd  
been born. When Naru ran off to chase after Seta, Kitsune felt abandoned..  
and so on." A smile grew across her face. "It was because of you.  
Everything good in your life has been because you were there, being your  
usual dumb self."  
  
"Don't you see?" she asked. "Your life touched others, and those lives  
touched still more. You've really had a wonderful life, Urashima Keitaro."  
  
Keitaro leaped out of the booth in a panic, and ran out of the restaurant.  
Clarice watched him leave, then smiled heavenward.  
  
---  
  
He found himself on the bridge again, crying. "I want to live again," he  
wept. "I can't stand to see this... I can't take any more... I want to live  
again..." He collapsed to his knees in the snow. "I want to live again.."  
  
"Keitaro?"  
  
Her voice pierced the fog in his mind like a brilliant shaft of sunlight.  
He looked, and saw Naru walking across the bridge toward him. She was  
dressed in clothes he'd never seen, and was carrying something under  
her arm. "Are you alright, Keitaro?" she called.  
  
Keitaro wiped his eyes and braced himself against the bridge railing,  
rising unsteadily to his feet. ".... Naru?" Had it all been a dream?  
  
The girl walked over and promptly pulled the bundle from under her arm -  
a winter coat. "I thought you might need this," she smiled.  
  
He slipped it on gratefully and shook his head a little. "H-how did you  
know?"  
  
Naru pointed over her shoulder at the end of the bridge, "Some girl came  
by the Inn, saying she'd seen some fool freezing himself to death on  
the bridge.." Her voice softened. "So I knew it must be you."  
  
Keitaro sighed. "But... I .. I lost the rent, I didn't get a passing  
exam grade.. I .. I shouldn't even go back there."  
  
Naru smiled knowingly. "Come on, I want to show you something." She  
grabbed his hand and began running up the hill towards the Inn, dragging  
him along.  
  
---  
  
"Here," Naru offered, handing Keitaro an envelope. Everyone was gathered  
in the living room in response to the commotion he had been making when  
they entered.  
  
"What is it?"  
  
"Read it," Naru scowled.  
  
"Okok," Keitaro nodded nervously. With cold and uncertain fingers he  
unsealed the envelope, and began reading aloud. "Mr. Urashima Keitaro,  
from... Tokyo University Admissions?!" Naru gave him a stern look, and  
he kept reading. "We are writing to apologize for an unforgiveable  
oversight.. computer error... you have been... accepted?!" He looked  
up in shock. "It's got to be a joke!"  
  
Naru shook her head. "I talked to one of Seta's colleagues about it.  
Apparently whoever was installing their new computer system didn't finish,  
but somebodyorother just arrived to hammer out all the bugs, so a few  
exam results that got switched around have been corrected." The  
enthusiasm she'd held in check bubbled out, and she leaped forward and  
hugged him tightly. "Congratulations!"  
  
Keitaro, stunned, let the letter fall from his hand and slowly brought his  
arms around Naru. "Th-thank you," he whispered. Naru blushed, while the  
rest of the girls cheered and catcalled.  
  
"Oh yes," Naru managed through a blush, quickly disengaging from the hug.  
"The girl who found you said you'd dropped this." She proffered a thick  
envelope.  
  
Keitaro's eyes grew wide. "The rent money!" Quickly he counted it.  
It was all there, every yen. "I'm saved!" he cheered.  
  
"Oh, there's one bit of bad news," Naru frowned. Keitaro blinked.  
  
Another envelope of money was pressed into his hands. He looked up to see  
Naru's smiling face. "I'm going to have to be paying extra to commute  
to University with you, since I'll be living here. So here's my portion  
of the rent. But I'll expect even better service from our caretaker.  
Got it?" she demanded.  
  
Keitaro nodded mutely. The lump in his throat wouldn't have let him say  
anything anyway. He could feel his eyes welling over with hot tears.  
  
Naru smiled, then guided him over to the couch and shoved him in the  
chest, forcing him to sit down. "Hinata caretaker-support-squad!" she  
barked, glancing at the assembled residents. The girls responded in  
unison, "Yes ma'am!" Naru pointed down at Keitaro, still in shock, and  
commanded, "This man needs hot tea and his pants are wet from the snow!  
Get to it!"  
  
Immediately they sprang into action. Shinobu dashed into the kitchen.  
Motoko headed upstairs to retrieve blankets. Kaolla Su, Naru and Kitsune  
gathered around the couch, grinning.  
  
"Y... you don't.... you're not going to ... you can't take my pants off  
in the living room.. Naru, waiiiit!" 


End file.
